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 Post subject: Day 4 off 4 mg - Help !
PostPosted: Mon Dec 13, 2010 7:03 am 
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I am 22 years old and abused opiates when I was 20 and 21 years old, finally I found a free program and doctor in my area that would give me Suboxone. It really was a miracle drug to me because I went from having no job and scraping anything together to buy one pill of Oxy to avoid getting sick.

My Girlfriend was supportive at first but now her and my parents think I shouldn't have another dependency and it eventually became clear that to enjoy life again I needed complete sobriety. Now I jumped 4 days ago at a stable dose of 2-4mg or a little less and the days arn't too bad, but I am writing this at 3:00 A.M. because when ever I lay still for more than a few minutes my upper body convulses, it's almost like the crazy leg syndrome but worse for me. I just took a couple crumbs of suboxone now so that I can hopefully sleep but now I have ruined all my hard work and failed my loved ones!!!

I called the hospital to see what they could do because I am in a program that covers only this hospital and the guy on the phone acted like I was a junkie, gave me no information and told me to keep taking my meds! Did I really ruin all of my progress by taking such a little amount? The withdrawals started the day after my last dose which was less than my usual 2 mg and if anything I think I am getting better after today.

I'm sorry if this makes no sense, I am just really messed up over this and don't know what to do because failure is not an option for me at this point.


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PostPosted: Mon Dec 13, 2010 7:12 am 
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Hello inneed. I'm so sorry about the situation you're in. You didn't ruin everything you've done by taking those crumbs. And please don't be so hard on yourself.

I hope you don't mind me saying that I do think it's a shame that your family/GF didn't allow you to make the decision yourself and pushed you off it without allowing time to do a proper taper. Many people taper down into the micrograms before jumping off. It can reduce the discomfort by tapering low and slow.

Can you see a doctor and perhaps get some clonidine to help with the w/d symptoms? Another thing that helps with the discomfort is, believe it or not, exercise. Many people swear by it. Also, have you tried any OTC sleep aid? Or even melatonin?

Lastly, keep focused on the fact that how you're feeling is temporary. You WILL get past this. Please keep us posted on how you're doing. Good luck to you.

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PostPosted: Mon Dec 13, 2010 7:28 am 
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Thank you for such a quick response. I am still awake and tried to lay down again with no avail. I have actually been doing a lot of exorcising these past days and it has helped but no matter how many push-ups I do I can't get my convulsions to stop when I lay down. My GF/Family were a big factor in this decision but I was the main factor, I wan't this for myself and I had a very positive attitude at first but not being able to sleep is really wearing me down to nothing compared to what I once was. I feel as depressed now as I did when I was overwhelmed with illegal substance abuse. I hope this is the worst of it, I really do!

I can't get any medicine to aid me in this venture because my doctor is a city paid doctor, {I don't have any health insurance and I am on a state assistance program) and this doctor wont even consider decreasing my dose, I have been taking this for over a year now and he thinks I am taking the prescribed 16mg or Suboxone A DAY!!! He is also always trying to get me on Xanax and other things to keep the money running in to his pocket. I ended up spitting the crumbs out and I am trying to stay calm and hydrated but this is really wearing me down to the point of almost giving in.

Again, thank you for at least responding, I wish I had some medicine to help me but my doctor is against it so I'm on my own I guess... :( I guess I just need to hear that tomorrow will be better at day 5 but I know no one can assure me anything, I just wish it was possible...


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 Post subject: answering this will help
PostPosted: Mon Dec 13, 2010 7:40 am 
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Do you have any Suboxone left, and have you already burned alot of bridges with these other people around you that "love" you... Your situation is the only one we can help...


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PostPosted: Mon Dec 13, 2010 12:18 pm 
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Sullimi - No, the people around me are 100% supportive of me and my progress so far. That is the biggest reason I don't want to fail. Yes, my mother has my Suboxone and I have probably about 200 8mg (Exaggerating a little bit) pills left because of being perscribed such a high dose and not being "allowed" to taper down at all, this is probably one of the biggest reasons my loved ones became so concerned about the situation. They know and try to understand that in some cases it's right for people to stay on this medication and it is in no way a bad thing. I just can't stand the fact that I need to always think back to my pill bottle when I wan't to travel or go camping or what ever might come up. I am so over drugs and I haven't hung out with or talked to a single friend in about 9 months, everyone is down the tubes in my small town and snorting/smoking Oxy's, it's really sad actually, how this drug is literally causing a HUGE problem in my suburb "heaven". So, relapse isn't an option either, especially after this journey.

Those "crumbs" I threw in my mouth last night out of desperation and then immediately spit out when I tasted them seem like they took their effect, sadly. (or not...) I am surprised because the amount was literally less then a couple shavings and I didn't expect to feel anything. I finally passed out at 4 A.M. and today is - day 5 - and I feel some of the symptoms of WD but it's a complete 180 from recently. I'm not getting excited yet as it probably was just the Suboxone and I'm going to need to take another 37 hours to feel the real deal.

I will keep everyone updated and let you know how I am tonight, unless I actually sleep from A LOT of NyQuil (sp?) and then in that case I would give a day 6 update. Well see, I am going to pray for success as I have been and I will use the fact that I feel a little bit better this morning to eat a lot of food and work out 2x harder. I really thought I was a strong person, after Iraq I thought I could do anything with ease.

I'm extremely happy I found this place, another forum I was reading the first 2 days of W/D was nothing but horror stories of 2 week long acute W/D all the way to a month and then years of PAWS. Until I found this place which seems a lot more optimistic I was loosing faith. Even after my endeavor is threw I will be here to help others because just talking about this makes it 5 times better than it was.


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PostPosted: Mon Dec 13, 2010 2:51 pm 
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UPDATE - It's almost noon day 4 and I am still feeling half decent, I know I can't expect much today in terms of feeling better but I am almost there! Last night was a pretty bad panic attack and I don't mean to scare anyone in to thinking this is the worst thing ever. Although it sucks, it's not the end of the world... I am hoping that the Subox I sort of took yesterday isn't contributing to my more up-beat mood.

I just worked out harder than I have in a long time and wen't on a 1 hour bike ride + walked the dogs for another hour. When I am moving and riding my bike it feels almost normal and I just don't want to stop long enough for my mood and condition to go down again. Picked up a bunch of yogurt and more Gatorade because liquids and soft substances are the only thing I can get down without gagging. I hope these will help as a substitute to Ammonium because it's not an option as it will compete with the antibiotics as I said earlier. I know I can do this like so many others have before me in even worse conditions. I could have cancer, be dead or still using with my old buddies in a dark dingy room. I am so ready to be apart of society and contribute to those around me.

I am going to an NA meeting tonight no matter how I feel because it seems like socializing helps as well to stimulate my brain. I am also going to do a lot of community service at a church in down town San Francisco all the way threw Christmas.

To anyone feeling down or going threw the same things I am currently, stay strong and be posative no matter what. Surround yourself with positive energy and loud, inspiring music.

Oh, and to the W/D's haunting me lately have a tall glass of f-you!! :twisted:


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 Post subject: inneed
PostPosted: Mon Dec 13, 2010 3:53 pm 
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Hey. Wow...what a friggin' tough situation. You poor thing...you must be feeling like a pile of dog poop.

I'm assuming you realize that you jumped from a very high dose. 2 mg is 2000 micrograms of Bup. To avoid getting awful w/d, it's best to wean to under 200 micrograms. People just don't understand this, SPECIFICALLY friends and family members who haven't been through it themselves. I had that problem. I weaned from 32 mg down to 3 mg and everyone thought I should just be able to quit because I'd weaned down 4 mg at a time before. It's not like that. I ended up pushing it too hard and giving up (until recently, and now I'm trying again).

Listen, those crumbs did not mess everything up, so just forget that thought. You're lucky that you have so many Subs leftover. I really think it may be a good idea to abort this massive jump and start a smart and slow weaning process. You need to educate your girlfriend. This is an unusual drug. I've spent hours explaining it to my husband, and now (thank God) he actually gets it. He's supportive and doesn't want me to freak myself out by quitting too high. You know what started truly bugging him was when I did huge jumps or quit taking it altogether and was ill for long periods of time. I also got mental when I did that and it affected our relationship so much that we almost got a divorce.

I hate to break it to you, but you most likely won't be fine in a week or two or even three. Don't you think that your family will get sick of you being sick?

Maybe try having your girlfriend watch Dr. Junig's Sub videos on youtube. If they understood better, they may see that this cold turkey thing is not the way to go. There are Suboxone films available now that can be cut into tiny pieces, making weaning easier. I know you have the tabs, and that's fine too. There's a liquid taper method that is described in detail on this forum and that's another method you could use. I guess I just don't see the point in the cold turkey-jumping off a cliff method, with a couple exceptions. Some people abuse their Sub and can't stop doing that. Other people just cannot stick to a gradual taper, and they realize this and know it won't work for them. In those cases, the only thing they can do it stop cold turkey, but if you can stick with weaning, why is it not best for YOU? The whole 'putting yourself first' thing is not a cliche. You have to be so very careful about the choices you make in your recovery. Addiction is a disease, and it deserves to be respected as such. You don't deserve to be punished for being an addict who is In RECOVERY!!! Suboxone is not the same as Oxy. You aren't getting loaded. I think the people around you just need to be brought into the loop. Don't start beating yourself up for having been on Suboxone or for taking those crumbs. Taking Suboxone was you taking responsibility for your addiction. Even if other people don't understand the situation, don't let that make you feel guilty.

Keep posting. This is a wonderful forum...the best Sub forum IMO :wink:

laddertipper

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PostPosted: Mon Dec 13, 2010 5:47 pm 
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laddertipper - Thanks for the response. I wish I could get the people around me to understand what it's like but even when surfing the internet the symptoms you read really don't sound too bad, and unfortunately thats the way they take it. Everyone says "It's like the flu, a bad flu" but I can only say that SOME of the symptoms are like the flu. I had a huge problem with my immune system as a kid and I would be sick throwing up for literally 2 weeks at a time and many times ended up hospitalized because of it. Even then, when I was 10, 12, 14, 15 years old it was nothing like this - I could SLEEP, I didn't feel like there was an easy quick fix to help me out. This is hard and I truly see where you'r coming from, I should restart and taper but I have to continue and take a chance that I will be lucky because of my young age and high metabolism etc. I couldn't imagine having to start this process again...

I hope it doesn't last weeks, I guess I am grasping for strings at this point to stay motivated and reading some of the success stories here of people around my age stopping at even higher doses truly gives me hope. The messed up thing is that I called my doc to ask for some assistance and that was a big mistake. I "dropped" the program because of my decision and have no choice unless I use my left over subs. It just seems like I am getting so close I can almost see the light at the end of the tunnel. So close... I never believed in God and lately praying is helping me out, and even at my lowest of lows I still do have a mother, father and a girlfriend of 4 years with me.

P.S. I made a mistake in a few of my posts saying I was at day 5, I wish I was... Time is lost on me and it is day 4 at this point. I will keep updating my progress.

EDIT : I am wondering because I have heard of the very long half life of Suboxone but for me I absolutely HAD to dose myself 2 mg in the morning and the other around late noon. The half-life of this drug really doesn't seem to last on me? Every morning I woke up I was feeling the beginnings of the W/D's even tho I just took my last dose at around 5P.M. the previous day. It's very odd because as far as I can tell it is the end of day 4 and it's definitely not getting worse as it does for so many others who jump off such a high cliff. Am I just wierd, is my metabolism the reason or what? I am so confused because even with old friends they wouldn't feel withdrawals on the same dose that I would the following morning and they would only dose once a day. So confusing, maybe I am a super mutant being?


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PostPosted: Mon Dec 13, 2010 11:09 pm 
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Hello Inneed,

I've attempted many times to get off Suboxone. I think it's a fantastic drug and I'm all for it, especially the incredible way it helps opiate addicts, but for me, I simply don't want to be dependent on anything anymore. I've tried weaning and that didn't work, at times I was either too impatient or it would still give me withdrawal and I would give up. Recently, I decided to take some days off of work and just do it cold turkey...I knew I would be sick and needed to just be in bed. Today is day 6 and I'm finally starting to feel better. I'm starting to think that maybe it's finally almost over (the withdrawals). I want to share tips with you that helped me. I read on another site that Magnesium/Zinc helps with that crazy leg feeling. It pretty much is RLS (Restless Leg Syndrome) and sometimes, when you're in withdrawal, you will feel it all over your body, not just in the legs. You're restless and you can't get comfortable no matter what position you get in. I bought some Magnesium/Zinc but was skeptical when I read that it helps, I was prepared for it to be B.S thinking the only thing that will help me (and how uncomfortable I am) is some form of opiate. Well, to my surprise, it actually works! For me, RLS was the worst withdrawal symptom and taking that away made it more do-able to actually stick through it! Take nice hot showers or baths, that will help you feel better afterward, it'll take away the soreness in your muscles. Drink lots of water to help flush out toxins. I would never recommend this next tip for someone who has a history of abusing benzos, but Xanax can also help with the anxiety you feel going through withdrawal and it will help you to sleep all the time so you don't have to feel the pain of withdrawal. Definitely try the Magnesium/Zinc if you go cold turkey again. Withdrawal will be rough, and you will question yourself if you will ever feel "normal" again or have energy again. Trust me, it will all be worth it and you will feel tons better! Tonight, I finally feel like the withdrawal has ended for me and I have never been more excited in my life! I've been severely addicted to opiates. Starting with Vicodin, then to Percocet, and ending with snorting Oxycontins all days long. For a few years, I've been dependent and now I finally have a feeling of relief thinking maybe I can finally get back to the old me once again. You have to make a plan if you want to succeed. It sucks to "plan to get sick"...who wants to do that? Most of us have no choice when we get an illness and we're forced to just deal with it. This is different, we know as soon as we stop taking this medication, we're going to be sick with horrible withdrawal. It's a total inconvenience to plan on being sick, but the end result makes it so worth it. I don't recommend cold turkey for everyone, but if you decide to try it again, I wish you the best and hope you make it through! Stay strong!


-Skyler


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PostPosted: Tue Dec 14, 2010 12:13 am 
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Skyler - It is day 4 and night time now, and I don't know how but somehow all of a sudden the coldness left me, my skin color returned to normal and I WAS HUNGRY for the first time in 4 days I ate like a frikin pig bro, it was all down hill after that. All of a sudden I was actually sitting in my living room with my mother and I was relaxed too!! I'm ecstatic right now and nothing but smiles, I watched the first "Home Alone" movie and cried like a little girl for some reason and it felt pretty good being the first time in probably 3 years I have shed a tear, I feel GREAT! The old me is returning and I see the light after 2 years of being up in the clouds numb to everything around me. It makes no sense to me because even in the best cases I have read about where people came off at a way lower dose than me day 4 it was no where near over. I can still barely walk around the house and my legs feel like they weigh a million pounds but I haven't slept in 3 days straight so thats no surprise. Don't know if it was the intensive work outs or what, maybe the protein shakes and the 50000 vitamins I took and 200 bottle of Gatorade but I feel so good it's freaking me out. I still haven't tried to sleep but at this point im so happy I dont care, im about to run down my street and wake up the neighborhood! (Not really, cops get me nervous) It just makes no sense and I feel blessed at this point.

I know I am not out of the woods yet and I may still have to deal with PAWS or some other lingering symptoms like the extreme anxiety and butterfly's in my stomach feeling but the worst is over I hope. Unless my body is just playing games with me and is going to crap out tomorrow. I could also be feeling better because the two days before quitting completely I took only a few crumbs before saying fuck it so maybe those counted as time served. Who knows but everyone has been very helpful and reading these forums is all I have done for the last few days.

If I get the RLS tonight I will definitely try you'r trick out tomorrow, calcium and yogurt helped a little and helped A LOT with the bathroom problems I had. I went from running to the bathroom every 5 minutes to maybe 3 times today.

I'm going to stick around these forums as long as possible to help anyone else who might be in a tight situation. Updates tomorrow. Peace. 8)


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 Post subject: I hate NyQuil!!!
PostPosted: Tue Dec 14, 2010 3:56 am 
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So today was great as I previously posted, all symptoms were doing way better than any other day and the day was coming to a close which is a scary thing because even in my ecstatic mood I knew that bed time would come soon and the severity of the W/D's would likely get worse as they usually do when I try to sleep. Decided to take some NyQuil went to sleep and woke up 2 hours later puking my fucking head off! I am having horrible heat flashes and my stomach is hurting something fierce. I guess I found the hard way that my body during W/D's along with many others doesn't respond well to sleeping aids like that and actually it makes it much worse.

Hope everyone has a good night rest tonight, I'm almost there but it looks like another night of boredom with a side of puking out NyQuil. Hey, one bright side is, in 5 more minutes it is technically day 5 woooohoooooo!!!! *BARF*


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PostPosted: Tue Dec 14, 2010 10:49 am 
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Officially 6:30 A.M. and I am still feeling as good as last night except I drank coffee which doesn't help the last major symptom I can't shake and thats the high blood pressure B.S. Looking back on my 1 year of being on Suboxone I spent a lot of money out of my own pocket because I was fainting and one time felt like I had a seizure (I didn't) and I was only 21 years old. Thats not right, right? Well after numerous times showing my concerns to the doc he finally told me the answer; just move slowly! lol, telling an active 21 year old to move slowly is complete b.s. Anyway, not mad at the doc, he probably had no idea that my blood Pressure was low because of Suboxone but now it all makes sense because my heart is like "wtf is going on here?!?! how do I beat properly, it's been almost 2 years with a depressant!" My damn heart is pumping like a race car and it sucks because theres no way to relax or get any sleep because of it but honestly I am so surprised my BP was effected AT ALL, it's kind of like actually being able to feel my heart beat slower and slower every day which is so reassuring and I apologize to it every time I try to sleep, oh well it's pissed at this point so with no separation options were stuck with each other forever. :lol:

Anyway, for anyone interested, my symptoms include a lot of anxiety which was a problem for me my entire life, the BP and some occasional cold sweats when I first wake up or start working out but those don't really bother me much. Obviously the BP causes RLS (Restless leg syndrome) to be an issue when I try to sleep but I only get restless when I close my eyes and start fading away. Also, something I learned is obviously you want Clonodine (sp?) but if you're like me and cant get it do not take NyQuil or any other strong sleeping med because for me my brain was asleep and my heart was pumping so the mixture caused a bad night and lots of puking in the toilet.

My bathroom problems are almost completely gone now which is great because I haven't taken anything for it. Only natural yogurt and protein shakes and I could really feel my body thank me after all of the supplements. Going to try the Magnesium and Zink suggestion from Tyler and see if that helps me sleep. I'll let you guys know tomorrow.

I am almost there, I can feel it and despite the sleep deprivation and being bored at night the days make up for it ten fold. I am already giddy like a kid again and I just ramble on and on and on to anyone around me. More updates to come...


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PostPosted: Tue Dec 14, 2010 11:12 am 
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The high blood pressure you're experiencing is likely from the withdrawals, not a response to being off suboxone. That's why clonidine helps so well with w/d symptoms - because it lowers the BP. Suboxone (up to the ceiling) can depress respiration. I've never heard of it lowering anyone's blood pressure or heart rate. My blood pressure has been basically the same my whole life, no change when I was on regular opiates or now that I'm on suboxone - definitely not lower. What I do have is issues with tachycardia and so I take a beta blocker for that (Metoprolol).

I'm glad you're still feeling better. And you don't have ANY doctor (primary care?) that can give you Clonidine? I hope you continue to feel better.

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PostPosted: Tue Dec 14, 2010 11:26 am 
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hatmaker - Thanks for the correction, I only read the internet for information last night while not sleeping and thats how I compiled the info my mistake. I don't have a doctor anymore, I was on a state assistance plan and they thankfully covered all expenses and even the suboxone was free, no co-pay nothing. When I told my doctor what I was doing he immediately dropped me from the program and told me to not come back. The main hospital here in San Francisco covers me 100% thanks to the state so I could have gone there in theory for some help but I stupidly told them I just stopped taking my meds and at that point they didn't want to talk anymore and recommended that I medicate myself. :shock: Not really the advice I needed on day 3... I will be on my parents health care by the end of the year, (thanks to the new health care plan by Obama) but by then it will be over I assume so it looks like I am just going to have to do it on my own, I made it this far so the worst is over. The not sleeping is weighing a bit on me but well see what happens. No matter what I am going to continue with my progress and push threw the last remaining symptoms.


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 Post subject: inneed
PostPosted: Tue Dec 14, 2010 12:24 pm 
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Man, I wish, wish, wish there was some way for you to scrape up the money...take up a collection? or something so that you could get some Clonidine. You are obviously tough, so if you just had that stuff, I think the rest would be a lot easier.

I've had the same reaction w/ NyQuil. Holy cow. I take 1/2 a dose, if that, and mainly when I get this dry cough from w/d. Does that happen to anyone but me? The dry throat, tickly thing that makes it impossible to sleep? I only gag that NyQuil stuff down in serious emergencies because it wins the award as the WORST EVER tasting crap!!!!! It couldn't be worse. Am I wrong? I'm getting that acid nausea feeling just thinking about that stuff. Blech. I bet after barfing it up you won't be able to stomach it ever again :D Ewwww!!

I understand that you don't want to taper and would rather just bite the bullet and get it over with. I've thought about doing it myself. Frankly, I'm just too much of a sissy, and I've been on Sub since 2005, so I know I'll get PAWS. Hopefully, that won't happen to you. It doesn't happen to every single person, and if you do get it, you may be able to handle it with not much trouble. It seems like you have a really strong drive and desire to do this, and that's the only way a person can get through it. It sounds like this isn't just about your girlfriend and what she wants. It sounds like YOU want to do it. Would you agree? Really, it's good that your on here because you'll get tons of support and you won't feel as alone. AND many people on here have been right where you're at so they can truly comprehend the nasty side effects and how exhausting (literally) they are. I had to cold turkey too one time for one week and it was...NOT fun at all. I did not sleep for the whole week. I remember seeing spots and stuff in my peripheral vision. I recommend you do not drive this tired. And also, my biggest advice is that you do not make any big decisions or changes in your life while you are in w/d. I cannot harp on this point enough. It's gonna take you a while to think straight, even though you may believe you are thinking straight or even finally seeing things clearly. I flipped out while in w/d and decided I needed a divorce. Seriously, I was kinda just running and running and spinning and spinning. Did a lot of damage. But at the time, I believed I was finally un-numbed and needed to rearrange my whole life. I thought I was un-numbed because all of a sudden I was crying at the drop of a hat. I remember watching Benjamin Button and I cried from the first credits on. Then Into the Wild...same thing. Nuts. Do you really feel like Sub has numbed you that much? I don't think it's been a tremendous difference for me. Sure, I haven't cried much, but I don't cry much off of Sub...(only in w/d).

Don't change anything. Just hang in there and take care of yourself as best you can and give as much stuff as you can a rain check. When I get on here and read that you finally got a good sleep, I'm going to do a big happy dance. :D

Good luck!!! Keep updating!!

laddertipper

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 Post subject: Re: inneed
PostPosted: Tue Dec 14, 2010 7:39 pm 
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laddertipper wrote:
Man, I wish, wish, wish there was some way for you to scrape up the money...take up a collection? or something so that you could get some Clonidine. You are obviously tough, so if you just had that stuff, I think the rest would be a lot easier.
laddertipper

I have quite a bit of cash saved up right now in my bank but I am saving to buy a new classic muscle car because 2 years ago I sold my chevelle to support my habit after loosing my job. Funny how 15,000 dollars goes real fast when you have an addiction. I was buying huge amounts of pills and binging for weeks letting all my friends take what they wanted. Stupid, stupid things we do in life. So besides that I don't have much spare cash, today has been pretty good but I half a massive head ache on one side of my head from being so damn tired. I can't even lift my weights for long enough to get some endorphines going. I just need to sleep now and give my mind a rest now that my body has stopped fighting me. Durring this whole fight to keep going it was mind over matter, night after night, day after day non stop. Problem is, I can lay still and don't have RLS! Sooooo relaxing, bit still one pretty big problem, I can't sleep? I am so tired and theres nothing me stopping but when I close my eyes I just lay there looking at the back of my eye lids for a couple hours and then give up. It's a whole lot better than before, I am probably at 50% and when I finally sleep I beleive I will easily be at around 85-90% there. Well see how tonight goes, I have a feeling I will sleep for a couple of hours and then I will wake up for no reason.
laddertipper wrote:
Don't change anything. Just hang in there and take care of yourself as best you can and give as much stuff as you can a rain check. When I get on here and read that you finally got a good sleep, I'm going to do a big happy dance. :D

Good luck!!! Keep updating!!

laddertipper


Thanks for the kind words, I'm almost there and it' down hill from here. I'm picking up speed and soon I'll be normal. 8) I'll keep the updates coming. Also, it seems I lost track of time and had my days all messed up, my mom has kept a calendar and tomorrow will be day 6 so I think it wasn't so bad for the amount I jumped from. Well see.


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PostPosted: Wed Dec 15, 2010 1:42 am 
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Hello and welcome inneed,

Thank you for sharing your story with us! Your doing a great job, you sound like a very strong young man and I wish you the best and will keep you in my prayers. I believe that your getting very close if not through the worst of the wd's. Think positive!

I have been on subs for 10 months now after a 11 year opiate habit and before that many more drugs. I am prescribed 20mgs a day, but I only take about 8mgs. I was down to 5, but about a week ago the stress of my mom getting sick and holidays and a bunch of other shit, I decided to go back up to 8mgs through x-mas, because I was very close to using again.

Anyway please keep us updated, you are a inspiration to many! You give me hope! :D Keep up the good work


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PostPosted: Wed Dec 15, 2010 11:25 am 
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hancal106 wrote:
Hello and welcome inneed,

Thank you for sharing your story with us! Your doing a great job, you sound like a very strong young man and I wish you the best and will keep you in my prayers. I believe that your getting very close if not through the worst of the wd's. Think positive!

I have been on subs for 10 months now after a 11 year opiate habit and before that many more drugs. I am prescribed 20mgs a day, but I only take about 8mgs. I was down to 5, but about a week ago the stress of my mom getting sick and holidays and a bunch of other shit, I decided to go back up to 8mgs through x-mas, because I was very close to using again.

Anyway please keep us updated, you are a inspiration to many! You give me hope! :D Keep up the good work


Thanks hancal106, hey I hear you on the stress factor equating to the need for a higher dose of Suboxone, I am not sure but the way it made me feel and many people I know it was a great anxiety killer. I know it supposedly doesn't get you "high" but when I dosed in the morning it was like a cup of coffee and I was in the best mood and same goes for my late afternoon dose, if I took my second dose too late in the evening I wouldn't go to sleep for a long time. Anyway, stepping up the Subox dose is far better than using, thats for sure so you did the right thing.

It's morning on day 6 and last night was the first night I slept at all, maybe due to the sleep deprivation for many days now. I would still wake up every hour or couple of hours but instead of fighting it or getting up and doing something as usual I just thought of my time in bed as rest so even if I wasn't getting the best sleep I would recover my sleep schedule. My biggest fear and the worst part of the whole 6 days was the lack of sleep and the RLS which seems like it could have been avoided if I had worked together with a doctor to get some medications to assist me like Clonodine (sp?). I'm definitely way past the worst of this, day 3 was the worst and day 4 I started feeling better and better but still as soon as sleep time came symptoms would arise.

I still have a lot of anxiety tied to night time and when I drink my coffee in the morning but other than that I don't get many sweats, aches or anything. Energy is a little lower than usual but I was just sick for a week so thats a given, hopefully tonight will be even easier than the last.


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PostPosted: Wed Dec 15, 2010 12:36 pm 
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Yeah!!!!! You slept!!!! I am doing a big happy dance for you. Even if it wasn't a full 8 hours, it's huge that your brain shut off and let you sleep. What a relief, huh?

You're doing pretty darn well for Day 6. Your drive amazes me. The only way I went a week w/o Sub was because I HAD to before surgery. I'm pretty sure I couldn't do it on my own without any huge motivator.

Yeah, I'm sure it would be easier with Clonidine, but people have side effects to that stuff as well, so....not sure. Some people get a hangover from it. And remember your experience with NyQuil? I think I'll eventually try it out and just take a teeny little piece of one. I had enough hangovers during my drinking days. Every morning was a hangover. Anything that resembles a hangover freaks me out. But I despise restless leg. It's soooooo irritating!!!! Thank God your legs have decided they aren't quite as restless now.

How cool that you're saving up for that car. You deserve a reward for going through this IMO. How are your girlfriend and your other family reacting to all this? Have they been a little surprised at the symptoms?

You aren't weird or a mutant when it comes to having to dose twice a day because the Sub would wear off and about how fast you go into w/d. I KNOW Sub has a long half life. I've been told all about how it's not possible to feel w/d after one day, blah, blah, blah. I do think it has something to do with metabolism. I have a fast metabolism and I eat like a gigantic pig and I'm prettyl thin. It makes sense that I'd metabolize the Sub faster, as well. I think you're in the same boat.

Inneed, I'm going to do some more research on what people going off Sub should be taking, as far as supplements and change in diet. Apparently there are things that are typically depleted in our brains and bodies and if we replenish them, it will make the recovery time easier and shorter. Anything anyone knows about this and can share would be so very appreciated. I've even heard that coffee enemas are good. :shock: Yikes!

laddertipper

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First you take a drink, then the drink takes a drink, then the drink takes you. ~F. Scott Fitzgerald


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PostPosted: Wed Dec 15, 2010 1:17 pm 
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laddertipper - Yeah motivation is something I had a lot of but although these things should always be done for YOU it's nice to have other motivations like a girlfriend and family that disagree because if they were 100% fine with me taking the Sub I would have had even less motivation. That might be just me but it did certainly help. Music was a huge factor in all of this too which I haven't even mentioned. Every day for hours on end I listened to inspirational up-beat music and on nights I couldn't sleep thats all I did.

The anxiety I have is getting bigger every day that I get better from other symptoms, it seems like when one thing goes away a new obstical comes about to take its place. Only shitty thing is anxiety cripples me to the point of not wanting to move and freaking out but I am sure this will dissipate as well in time.

The people around me were shocked at the symptoms, they know me and that I don't usually exaggerative anything when it comes to fear, pain or issues so that alone proved my point and my mom has done as much as she could for me so I am grateful for that. My girlfriend has been supportive to, I have only seen her once durring this whole thing and thats because I didn't want to create more problems, she was fine with that and today were going to go shopping for Christmas presents so it will be a huge test around hundreds of people with long lines and lots of standing around.


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