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PostPosted: Thu May 05, 2011 11:24 pm 
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hello in here this is the first time ive been able to get out of bed in ten days. I was on sub for 3.5 years. I jumped off at 16 mgs. I don't reccomend it but thats the way i decided to do it. very similar history as all of you. hooked on oxy for 2 years. got on sub to get off that. But since then all the different doctors I have been seeing have never even tried to taper me off. if any thing at one point I was at a quarter of a pill for 6 months. should have jumped then. but it never seemed that there was a good time to miss work in withdrawl. So I stayed on, subsequent docs raised my dose up to 16 mgs a day. One of them said hey would you rather be running around looking for OC? As you all know the visits and med are pretty expensive about 500 a month or more. I just got sick of being a SLAVE to this wonder drug. enough is enough. This is day ten for me and the second day I have been able to eat solid food. Plus all the usual crud involved with kicking opiods. has anyone in here jumped off at this dose and how much longer do i expect to feel so chewed up.


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PostPosted: Sat May 07, 2011 6:18 pm 
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Now it is day 12 of no subutex 16 mgs a day or more for 3.5 years. I actually drove my girl to work and went to go get a haircut. No depression, actually everything is very sureally clear like I am wearing a new type of glasses. things smell very strong things move a little faster than usual. its kinda cool ....I feel like I have freed myself. Everyone including my doctor recommended not to do it this way. " Taper Taper its the only way. I am an addict. there is no such thing as taper only more more more. now I want this cloud that ive been under to be gone. sorry to sound so harsh and bleak, but you guys have to realize that your mind is very powerful force. It can kill you. or it can save your life. Im actually sorta feeling stuff i havent felt in years. A little upset a myself for perpetuating this for so long looking for the easy way out. or down. But so what I actually functioned today without that Wonder Drug for the first time in years. No pink cloud, I still feel weak and sweaty and i get the chills still but I have been forcing myself to walk and do simple stuff like doing the dishes or taking out the trash. I am seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. I dont care if you guys dont reply. just read how this guy is doing it..... STOPPING SUBUTEX!!!


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 Post subject: Impressive
PostPosted: Sat May 07, 2011 6:49 pm 
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Hey Boik,

Wow! To jump at 16mgs seems nuts but you did what you had to do. Congratulations on being so far along and past the worst part. Now just stay away from it and all should work out in the long run.

Personally, I will taper as low as I can. Won't try to jump until under .50 unless I get w/d's before that.

Great job!


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PostPosted: Sat May 07, 2011 7:03 pm 
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I dont recommend it but thats what I did its no picnic. still feel weak and all that. about a year and half ago i was at 2mgs a day for like 6 months i always felt like i was in a slight wthdrawl another doc raised me up to 24 mgs to " stabilize me" basically insuring i would come back and pay her the 280 a visit.. whatever quack wench.. no more thanks for the reply hang in there remember trading one for another is no miracle or wonder just a crutch. so we didnt have to feel like crap for a couple of weeks Im going over to a friends house now its so awesome that ican walk eat drive. good luck it gets better just give yourself a week or so to feel like crap.. remember there is no easy way.


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PostPosted: Sun May 08, 2011 2:50 am 
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boik, I hope you are hanging in there and that you're feeling better every day. It is good that you are pushing yourself to get out and see friends, do chores and get a bit of exercise - I think all of those things will help you through your withdrawal.

I know that right now you're not feeling great and that probably colors your perception of the value of Suboxone as a treatment for addiction - and that's ok. I just wanted to point out that for a lot of us, the decision to stay on Sub is about more than just putting off feeling crappy for a couple of weeks. Sub maintainence can also be about buying some time to get stable and rebuild & repair our lives from the damage of active addiction. For a lot of us, that time is the difference between life and death.

I didn't jump from as high a dose as you, so I don't feel qualified to predict how long it will take you to get through your withdrawals. From what I've read, it seems like the worst of it is over in 3-4 weeks, but some withdrawals can linger on much longer than that. I jumped from a low dose and my withdrawals were really mild, but it still took about a month for me to feel about 80% of normal - mostly I was just tired and sneezy. Exercise and social support really helped get me through.

Take care and please keep us updated on how you're doing. There's a great group of people here and I hope you find the support that you need.

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 Post subject: Not bashing sub
PostPosted: Sun May 08, 2011 10:13 pm 
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Today I got up drove to local mountain and made it about a quarter of the way up. Things still seem very bright and super vibrant. I attribute that to my pupils being constricted for the last 5.5 years. I couldn't make it to the top but I got my Tail out of bed and tried before getting exhausted and coming back down. I got home ate, which is nice since the first 8 days or so were spent tossing all food back up. today is day 12 or 13 I forget ill have to look up my first post. day by day my strength is coming back. I agree that when I chose to stop looking for and spending all my money on OC sub let me get back to work with no withdrawal which was great. for the next 3.5 years not once did all 3 separate docs say hey why don't we try to work you down. or wean me off. why would they. they can justify it many ways if hes on sub he wont relapse its much safer than the alternative.. or IT JUST kept me coming back. one of them eventually lost her liscence for over prescribing pain pills to her other patients. the last guy a board certified addictions psychiatrist made me visit him Three times the first month then raised my dose to where it was at when I went cold turkeyit cost me about 800 bucks that month including meds. That is a porsche payment. His justification was that he needed to stabilize me. or set the hook... Sorry to sound so bitter , I'm not really, actually I feel a little empowered. sort of like hey mr doctor guy get some other person to make you vacation house payment this month. I'm not saying that titration is the wrong way, if it works for you guys it works. i got down to about 1 mg a day for a little bit but felt right on the cusp of feeling like crap. This med is very very strong and i believe that most doctors who prescribe it do not know hard the withdrawal is they all told me its not bad at all. Whatever. Just telling my story not giving advice.


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PostPosted: Sun May 08, 2011 11:49 pm 
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It's cool, boik...I'm glad you had a better day. And I agree that a lot of doctors are misinformed about Suboxone, especially regarding how hard it can be to stop taking it.

Go with that feeling of empowerment, that is great. You are making a positive change and that is awesome. We're here for you, keep us posted.

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PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 1:54 am 
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Yes, and another thing is that when you post about having jumped off of SIXTEEN milligrams....well, it does make me think I can do it too!!!! I mean, wow, you are BRAVE!!! You are out of bed and actually going somewhere. That is incredible. 16 mg is a crazy high dose to jump off of, but if you can do it, then maybe some of us who are terrified of jumping off 1 or .75 or .5 will have a little more confidence that we can make it too. So, you are inspirational in that way and I'm thankful that you are posting.

laddertipper

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PostPosted: Mon May 09, 2011 9:35 pm 
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Today might be day day 14 or so I still feel a little weak, but I can eat get out of bed and take a shower, and drive. I am not trying to be a hero. I am just telling my little story of how and why I decided to get off this drug. I am no doctor but I am pretty in tune with my body. Remember I was on sub for quite a while. and never jumped off because I was scared of the withdrawal. so i was in the same boat as all of you for 3 or more years. There is never going to be a perfect time to feel like holy crap for a week or more. Those are the consequences of my addiction. I just took some advice of a buddy who quit multiple substances cold turkey 8 months ago. He just kept telling me MIND OVER MATTER. and that i wasnt going to die, he said feel like shit, puke, writhe around for a while, but day by day that crap will leave your system. and you wont be a slave to a board certified drug dealer. He said stop making his BMW payment then go back to him when your over the w/d and tell him how you really feel about maintenance drug taking. Thank you all for perusing my rantings, and I hope it may give some of you strength. or confidence . PS ladder if you stop taking it at your dose your mind will be your worst enemy, you have to tell yourself it will hurt, but like the flu it will go away. and your eyes will open again its actually pretty cool stuff now is super intense and kinda new. any way my 2 pennies.


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PostPosted: Wed May 11, 2011 9:28 pm 
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Hello out there in stopping suboxone land today is day 16 and I feel somewhat okay not too weak or the other crap involved with w/d. i just got back from a high performance car shop I used too work at, I spent the whole day helping tune a race car for this weekend. Its about 90 degrees here, no chills i ate chinese and I'm not seeing double or weird colors any more. my appetite has come back full force. for those of you who ar questioning my history here it is. In 2000 I lifted something way too heavy and crushed three disks in my lower back. when it happened my legs were numb for 2 days pretty scary. I went back to work 3 weeks later and just dealt with the nagging pain Im a chef I stand all day whatever. 4 years later I was in a pretty intense motorcycle wreck shattered my tib fib and some sprained stuff road rash ect. the doc gave me ms contin i took them as prescribed but liked the feeling. 05 was introduced to oc then it was 2 years of that no pain and I could work 13 hours a day seven days a week no problem.. nothing a line of oc wouldn,t help.. got on sub. to regain my bank account, and was on that for 3.5 years until 16 days ago. I am just like all of you. or you can make excuses and say that your pain was worse, maybe, I do know pain. I was scared to death to stop the sub because my doc said of gosh the w/d will keep you from work you will relapse oh did I mention I am also a recovering alcoholic also .. so when a doc figures that out you get no more fun stuff for pain.. The docs had 2 reasons for the sub maintenance one was less likely to relapse on both accounts. and as an analgesic for my back. I read a lot of all of your posts and all i keep reading is how to wean to slivers of some film in numbers that are under a mg. My belief is this. if your body is used to half a milligram of sub then when you take it away it will get pissed, that's mad to you Brits. so 8 6 4 2 whatever your body is used to that dose and yes there will be discomfort. I'm not trying to down play this at all just give you guys some hope that whatever dose you decide to stop at. You will feel like crap then it will get better. and you will be free, if you actually want it. Or just keep looking for the absolutely painless method. all of you didn't become addicts over night, getting off is the same . takes some time . Me again feeling very clear headed and enjoying music again my libido is also coming back. all of you know what I am talking about. the docs didnt tell me that 3 years ago. every day I feel less like crap and more alive no drug induced numbness. thanks for reading


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PostPosted: Wed May 11, 2011 11:31 pm 
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boik, congratulations on accomplishing what, at least seems to me right now, to be the hardest this in the world to accomplish. It's weird and creepy how warped my thinking it that I see getting off Sub as the greatest and most incredibly difficult thing I could accomplish right now....

Anyway, I think you have something with saying no matter how much a person tapers, their body is going to eventually get pissed when they jump. Now, I think that someone can taper REALLY low and maybe avoid a lot of that, but other than extremely low tapers, I don't think there is a way around the rough part. I wish now I'd stopped at a higher dose, because now I've spent so long feeling kinda crappy that I'm fresh outa motivation and feel really stuck. I'm sure I'll un-stick myself in the future. I'm just not sure this is all worth it. I read so many stories, and it doesn't seem like there's a reliable correlation between jumping off at, say, 1 mg being easier than jumping off at, say, 12 mg, especially as far as the duration of symptoms. Your symptoms were obviously severe, but you know what? My friend jumped off 1 mg 1.5 months ago and she still has diarrhea. I'm sure tapering down to 200 micrograms or less would make stuff way easier, but it is a loooonnnnggggg process to get down to that small a dose reasonably comfortably.

Maybe your way wasn't the 'best' way, but is there a best way? You are getting to your destination, so it works, right? I'm so happy for you, and this is a HARD and a SCARY thing, so don't forget what you just did and how significant it is.

laddertipper

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 Post subject: tipp it
PostPosted: Thu May 12, 2011 11:01 pm 
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Dear Miss ladder, our histories are quite similar I too am a recovering lush. Today, I think is 16 0r 17 i forget. my comments made before are made without temper. I am an on or off type of addict. the whole taper thing never worked when I had a full bottle of Jaegermeister in front of me. I may just be reckless. But I can tell you that I have had more painful alcohol w/d's .. not saying this was a picnic, more of a mind f....k than anything else in the begining of it oh sure I was going to reschedule an appt with the Dope man with an MD. But day by day it got a little better. Slowly but surely I have approx 70% of my strength back. My appetite is back in full force, no real depression yet. still pretty high on the fact that I did it. If you do choose to make the jump its fully your choice, only you know your body. But I will tell you I have had much more violent w/ds than this. Just the truth.. If you do keep a fridge full of gatorade, ensure, imodium, maybe a ben or too if you can without going over board. Only during the times when you want to bash your head into a wall too sleep. just joking only about the head thing. I wish you strength, conviction, and fortitude in your choice to stop SUB... and when you are done spend that money on something you really want not some quacks mortgage. I may be a little jaded, but thats how I feel. Be strong and Keep telling yourself. this will go away. I support any choice you make, hope you gain a little hope from this. remember they want to keep you on this to keep you coming back......


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 Post subject: First Time Here
PostPosted: Sat May 14, 2011 10:29 am 
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Very first time posting....but I have been reading posts and coming to this web-site for quite awhile.

Interested in this topic of getting off of Suboxone....been on for 4years....no doubt it saved my life...but now I feel
stuck....
Did the cold-turkey thing from 16mg's a day for about 9 days and gave in and went back to the meds...take between 2 or 3 a day now...
Give them to my boyfriend to "dole" out to me because if I have them in my possession I take 4....5....6 a day....
I know this does nothing but waste money.....I know I can't get high...

I just feel totally lost....don't know where to turn...I do take an anti-depressent but doesn't even feel like that is working anymore...

Some days I feel like i am losing my mind......


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 Post subject: Another Lush Here
PostPosted: Sat May 14, 2011 1:07 pm 
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Hi Boik,

LT and you aren't the only lushes around here. I too drowned myself with alcohol up until I was 32, which was over 20 years ago. But like you and Laddertipper, we know how easy it is to get addicted to substances. First was drugs in my teen years, then alcohol, then cigarettes, and now pain meds followed by another nicotine withdrawal from Nicorette gum. THAT one was worse than my cigarette habit.

It seems like half our lives are spent quitting one thing or another, and then after getting off one we go try to feel good on something else. My oh my, the brain of an alcoholic addict is one messed up grey matter.

I just wanted to chime in here to say it actually pleases me to have others here who struggled with alcoholism followed by addictions.

So far I count three of us, enough to have a meeting!


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PostPosted: Sun May 15, 2011 2:26 am 
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peakclover...your post just broke my heart. You need to get stabilized on one dose. I would be glad to be your friend and encourage you to do that. I wrote you a private message.

If you want to get stabilized and feel better, please write me back. It really messes you up to take different doses each day. Sub was not meant to be used like that. Even tho you cannot get high, it is still a very strong opiate.

For it to work best, you need to be on the same dose, everyday and taken at the same time(s). Please discuss with your doctor getting stabilized and like I said, I'd be happy to be your friend here and help.

God Bless, peakclover :)


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