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PostPosted: Sun Aug 21, 2011 1:40 pm 
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I say this because I got a call from my daughter that the women's chemical dependency center she has been going to since August 8 is so loosely run that she spends most of her time out on the street taking buses to and from town trying to get money alledgedly for food because of the "hideously inedible" food that is served inside the center. So she went to sell her blood.

There are 4 other women in her room. Three of them are court-ordered, mostly on crack and heroin. The fourth is on Xanax and Alcohol. She also has two black eyes and a wired-shut jaw from her boyfriend beating her. They went to sell their blood too. For $50 a pint. Kim was turned down because her veins are not big enough. Huh? I never gave blood before so this sounds suspicious to me. So I put another $20 in her bank account and let her case worker know what's going on. She has to take a bus to get to the bank and walking is un-safe where she is. The $20 I gave her for food a week ago was stolen. Did I tell you about 70% of the center's population being domestic violence and that children are running loose all over the place? They also get at least 2 bomb scares a week from a disgruntled husband or boyfriend. Any CD patients returning supposedly are given a breath test and urine test. If positive, they are let out of the program and return to jail. Buprenorphine urine strips are not in supply but they are ordering them.

What I want to know is what is out there for people like my daughter who are only addicted to Suboxone and have tried to get off of it and can't (she relapsed 5 times already). It has such a grip on her that I'm beginning to believe the doctors who have told us she would "probably be on it for life." And that life is not something that can take care of her 3 children or get a job and function in a sober world. We have looked for help for 11 yrs. now, everyone from Dr. Drew himself to Hazelden. It boils down to this - no money - no treatment. But there sure are an endless supply of Suboxone Doctors who will write a script without even testing the patient.


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PostPosted: Sun Aug 21, 2011 9:36 pm 
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This is truly a horrible situation and I'm sorry your daughter can't get the help she needs. For many of us on this forum, Suboxone is actually the tool that helps us to function normally, to hold down a job and take care of our kids without being high or craving drugs. Remembering back to your first post, the behavior you described your daughter having is not typical of someone in Suboxone treatment. It does sound like she is either using other substances or is suffering from an untreated mental illness. As far as going off of it 5 times and relapsing, it is generally not recommended to go off of Sub cold turkey like people do with other drugs like heroin. Most people need to go through a long slow taper, and there are several threads on this forum describing that process.
I totally agree that there is very little or no help for those in poverty. I have friends and family members who qualify for state aid but then cannot find a doctor who will take it, or find doctors who are sub par. I know she has burned a lot of bridges, but her best hope is to get to a legitimate Suboxone doctor (unlike the pill mill doc she is going to). A real doctor can assess her mental health issues, prescribe the appropriate medications and limit and closely monitor her Suboxone intake. And if it really is in her best interest to go off Sub s/he can put her on a long term taper program that will have a greater chance of being successful. There is a link at the top of this page for finding a doctor. Also there are a lot of resources at Naabt.org, and Reckett-Benckiser (the manufacturer) has a program for people who cannot afford their prescription.
I can certainly understand why you are upset with the facility K is in. Just hearing about it (and I've seen places like that, too) makes me wonder how an affluent country like ours can offer so little to abused and addicted people. I will keep you, your daughter and all of those other suffering people in my thoughts and prayers.
Lilly


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PostPosted: Sat Sep 03, 2011 5:13 pm 
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How has your daughters behavior been sense she has been at the treatment facility? If I remember right she was staying up all night and sleeping through the day. She also had some odd cleaning and eating patterns. Have any of them changed? Have you talked to her counselor? Has you daughter signed any paperwork so that you can be informed of her progress or problems? I really wish I had some words of wisdom to share with you. I have been reading you updates and am very interested in how she is doing.
I had some strange side effects when I first started on suboxone. The biggest problem was that I was so tired all the time and had some sleep disturbance issues. I think my dosage was a little to much, and I took a couple of other medications that had being tired as a side effect. When I quit taking all the other meds and my dosage was dropped a little it made a big difference. I also found out that I needed to take my dosage before 3 in the afternoon so that I slept better. I don't sleep well if I take it closer to bedtime. I had some sleep walking too. I was also told that some of the problems I had were due to me using drugs for the last 8+ years and it takes time(years) to repair some of the damage.
I agree 110% with everything Lilyvil said. I think you need to get to the bottom of her untreated mental illness or find out if she was/is abusing other drugs. If she wants to stay on suboxone she needs to start taking control of her recovery. Either she needs to see a psychologist and find out what is going on with her or get off of the street drugs, start taking recovery serious, and get a job. When she was stealing for Suboxone money she still had an addict mentality. I have had to get a second part time job to pay for my treatment.
I hope I'm not being ruff on your daughter, but I feel that she isn't being honest with you. I am praying for you. I hope that you questions will be answered and you will be able to have some peace.


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PostPosted: Sun Sep 04, 2011 11:15 am 
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Thank you smnell and lilyval for sharing your Sub experience. Yes I have full rights of disclosure from any of my daughter's medical providers past, present and future, signed, notarized and filed in court. Her Sub doctor is not going along with the program. Herefuses to talk to me. Maybe he will talk to the DEA.

My daughter who has been on Sub for 8 yrs. seems to be doing better. About the only saving thing I can say about the place she is in is that they give her a urine test whenever she leaves (on a pass issued with a 10 PM curfew) and comes back, which is frequent. I have yet to hear back from her caseworker if the strips they are using are for Buprenorphine.

She has been going to the free classes outside this non-profit rehab facility and the mandatory group sessions inside for which she gets stars stamped on a card. When filled, you can purchase things from the commissary like used clothing, lice combs, plastic sheets and soap, but no food. That is the duty of the food service dept. who doles out daily iceburg lettuce with no dressing, boiled chicken and cantaloupe.

Because she is only hooked on Suboxone, considered by most to be The Cure for opiate addiction, she has had to create other qualifying symptoms to stay there. She said she has been beaten by her boyfriend. The truth is she had not had a date since High School. Her husband died of Testicular Cancer on Sept. 3, 2003. And she has no friends.

Until now.

Yesterday, Sept. 3, she had a 26 yr. old Meth addict bring her home so she could attend her 14 yr. old daughter's Birthday Party. Since she missed the last eight and was neither invited nor expected, there was no fanfare from her daughter upon arrival. She said she was court-ordered into the facility after serving a 2 yr. prison term and 6 mos. in jail. She has three children ages, 8, 5 and 3. All were adopted at the beginning of her prison term. She was married to her dealer and manufacturer. They were sweethearts at 14, hooked by 15. Her mother died 1 month ago and she did not attend the funeral. She was a crack addict.

My daughter was pretty euphoric when she got here. Her pupils seemed to be normal, lacking the Vaseline-like glossiness I see when she is taking Sub. On the unexpected visit prior to this, when she and three of her fellow inmates took the train here expecting to get my spare car, her eyes were lit up like fireworks. I couldn't detect a pupil at all.

Physically she has a torn tendon on the back of her thigh, a herniated disc and 4 teeth that need pulling or pulped out. (I'm so glad I spent $5,000 on braces). Once a month a team of 15 doctors and dentists descend upon the facility on a one day marathon to quick-fix the medical needs of the Center's poplulation. You don't want to have an abcess on the day after they leave because you will have it for 29 days.

My daughter is getting a complete physical on Sept. 10 to qualify for Medicaid insurance. Hopefully she will get the tendon-repairing operation she needs, She limps and yelps with every step and walking blocks to her outside AA meetings are unbearable. For this, the center gives her a Tylenol. I am so hoping she gets this insurance so she can get ongoing help for her addiction and mental health issues when she gets out of this 8 week program.

As for the pain you feel when you are at the bottom of the pit, I don't think she's there yet. There was no emotion coming from her when we sang Happy Birthday to her daughter, which was also the anniversay of her husband's death.

Her Meth friend cried like a baby.


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