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PostPosted: Wed Feb 20, 2013 3:50 pm 
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49 Days

Or something close to that

- Well my LIFE has been turned upside down and around - and this time it's not from DRUGS. I don't care to get into the specifics because it's depressing, boring, and i've already depressed a few people via IM with it.

Anyhow since I've turned this thread into my soap opera a few times, I wanted to let everyone know i'll keep it going till day 60. I feel like this thread will be 400 posts long soon enough if I keep updating you on how my afternoon sandwhich tastes.

I(Xefr234s) just sneezed for the 2,304,131 time today. That's still around. Why.

It's safe to say at 50 days the symptoms that are just never going to go away for the rest of my life are.... Sneezing, Bad bowel movements, and non perfect sleep.

Compared to the first 3 weeks, it's absolutely PERFECT sleep though.

I've had no cravings and it's pretty much coasting along..

That's the update for now.

Later Gators,

-WTBF


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PostPosted: Wed Feb 20, 2013 4:11 pm 
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WTBF!

Hi buddy. Yeah, those annoying symptoms you mentioned stayed with me for 5 months and some I still deal with nearly 7 months later. I don't want to scare you, it gets easier.. you just don't notice it as much after a while but I know exactly how you feel. It feels like forever! Nice to "see" you.


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PostPosted: Wed Feb 20, 2013 4:18 pm 
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Hi Tiny!

It feels like it has been forever since i've "seen" you too :).

Hope you're doing well yourself!

You're coming up very quickly on that 1 year clean, we get to boast about that relapse rate soon enough.

Woot Woot

-WTBF


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PostPosted: Wed Feb 20, 2013 5:21 pm 
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Gotta throw this wrench in the gears... the relaspe rates are based on ALL mind and mood altering substances... not just opiates. A relapse is a relapse. So weed, alcohol, benzos, ect. All are relapses. I wish it was just as easy as only counting opiates. Not saying that anyone has used these things... just seems like a common theme and some thing that is constantly overlooked.


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PostPosted: Thu Feb 21, 2013 4:16 pm 
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Movie -

The argument that I'm basing that comment off was in regards to DR J.

Relapse for someone going to AA meetings 8 times a week can sure be counted as alcohol.

I've never had an addiction with anything but Opiates. I've never had an addiction with pot, I've never had an addiction with Alcohol. Dr J was speaking in regards to Opiate relapses. Never once did he mention anything about having a drink with family and friends as relapse in your recovery.

You're looking at this in the absolute NA / AA mentality. I'd rather shoot myself than adjust to that method.

I get a mood altering substance in running. I get a runners high. I get a mood altering substance from prescribed ADHD medication.

I must be destroying my recovery. Live life in moderation is my outlook.

You know what is funny about AA / NA meetings. You get preached that any type of drug is a relapse. Yet I've seen ciggarettes and caffeine for days in those meetings. If you take Nyquill with alcohol, you've relapsed? If you use mouth wash containing alcohol you've relapsed? If you get major surgery and are put on pain pills, you've relapsed?

Your clean date starts over? NA can kiss my ass.

I don't agree with that mentality. I don't agree you need any type of "system" or program to become clean either.

-WTBF


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PostPosted: Thu Feb 21, 2013 5:00 pm 
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He is a doctor specializing in the disease of addiction. This is just the way it is.... not strictly NA. If you are an addict.... no matter the substance... you cant use drugs anymore. If you are at the place in your recovery where you are justifying use of drugs by saying you never had a real problem with them.... go ahead.... it's just not good for your recovery and it never works for long. But. Dr J doesn't just refer to addicts using opiates as the only relapse while on Suboxone. There is no specification because it's usually just expected that when you are an addict... you can't use drugs. But. I've been there before thinking that if I just got the opiates under control then I'd be just as normal as the rest of the world. Stop kidding yourself.


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PostPosted: Thu Feb 21, 2013 5:05 pm 
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You are blurring the lines to work for you. You said goodbye to moderation long ago. Acceptance is key... or else you'll struggle through. Just like others you are finding the small unimportant things to make your choices feel better. Idk. I'm just saying I've been there.... but... good luck.


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PostPosted: Thu Feb 21, 2013 6:30 pm 
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MovieMaker said, "If you are an addict.... no matter the substance... you cant use drugs anymore."

Does your list of drugs include Nicotine or Caffeine?

I'm an addict. Can I still use Nicotine or Caffeine and be considered clean by your standards? Please let me know ASAP. If you say that I can't use Nicotine or Caffeine and be clean, then I'm gonna quit smoking and drinking coffee because I want so much to measure up to your standard of being clean. :lol:

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 Post subject: support
PostPosted: Thu Feb 21, 2013 6:53 pm 
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I've read the posts on the forums and feel like a naïve jackass. But I've been on 2 mg of subs for 3 months for chronic pain. Never been an addict, but I decided I wanted to get off subs and the posts are scaring me so much. I've heard it takes months?? I am just taking small amounts for the last 5 days and then going to go down again and again. I'm really freaking myself here. I also just got off all my antidepressants by doctors orders to see if we can start fresh. My side effects were kicking my tail, but I've found since that the subs were causing the nausea and dizziness. If I do it slowly I should be okay right? I just don't think me or my family can take anymore of my having bad days from side effects, chronic pain, depression, and anxiety.

Danielle


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PostPosted: Thu Feb 21, 2013 7:22 pm 
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What is your standard then? Doing every drug minus opiates? Wish I would've tried that since it works so well for many addicts.


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PostPosted: Thu Feb 21, 2013 9:14 pm 
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My standard is of no consequence to you, just as your standard is of no consequence to me.

IMO, clean has a LOT more to do with our behaviors, rather than any drug we may or may not take. You're trying to boil down who's clean or not by a list of drugs they take or don't take. I'm just saying I think being clean is about more than drugs. Ultimately, it's about our (addictive) behaviors.

Addiction can span a lot more than drugs too. Check out this list of different addictions (I honestly had no idea there were that many!!! :shock: ).

http://www.addictionz.com/addictions.htm

Do I need to avoid all of these activities because I'm an addict?

Do you see where I'm coming from?

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 Post subject: How are you now?
PostPosted: Mon Mar 18, 2013 11:16 am 
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Just wanted to say hello and see how you are doing generally nowadays. You have similar social issues to mine and I'm jumping c/t off 8mg per day load today, wondering when but knowing it will hit hard in a couple days.

DC

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'If you can't trade a cry for a good laugh, then opiates will rule your life forever'. -me
This is the reason I am ready to walk uphill for a finite infinity, in search of myself at the end of the marathon.


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PostPosted: Tue Mar 19, 2013 4:04 pm 
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Hi Donechasing

I'm doing quite well these days. All of my symptoms have completely faded to this point in time ( except IBS, but what the fuck ever i'll live with it ).

I would suggest a moderate taper instead of jumping at that dose. That's exposing yourself to more misery than is neccesary.

If you could stabilize yourself around 2-4 mg a day and than jump, you'd probably have a similar experience to my own. Mind numbingly slow to get through the process, but once you do and look back it didn't seem THAT hard.

I'd never want to ever do it again, granted. But it wasn't anywhere near impossible.

The best advice I can give you is to reach out. Talk about what you're going through. It's not a fun experience, but talking with others makes it that much better.

I like your name by the way. Soon you'll be Donechasing :).

& FREE.


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 17, 2013 7:11 pm 
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Hello Friends,

It's been a little over 5 months since I made the plunge. I've not had any set backs to note since my last update. Bathroom issues seem like they will never again regulate, but I can live with that.

I've had zero cravings, thoughts about subs or pills. I've been around them a few times and had zero urges to use again. I just wanted to let anyone looking for inspiration that this can be done, and more important can be maintained.

Life has jumped up and down for me, but I feel completely in control. Something I didn't feel for quite a long time. I hope everyone is doing well.

I honestly feel I'm FREE from this shit.

WantToBeFree checking out!


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PostPosted: Wed Jun 19, 2013 12:12 pm 
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WTBF, I am glad to hear that the cravings don't return. I haven't had any real cravings yet at over 3 weeks off of subs, but I worry that I'm going through all this w/d just to go back on them later because the cravings become too intense. Don't get me wrong, I'd go back on subs in a heartbeat if it was a choice between that and opiates. But it lightens my mood to hear that your cravings haven't returned.


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PostPosted: Wed Jun 19, 2013 3:52 pm 
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Hey freedom, my cravings didn't return until I was about 9 months off of Suboxone, but I have good news....you can learn to live with your cravings and with practice, you can also learn to minimize them greatly.

WTBF, Rock On, bro!!

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PostPosted: Wed Jul 09, 2014 3:43 pm 
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Hey, I enjoy reading threads from people who are several months or even years out. I know this ended over a year ago, but I’m just curious if you’re still going strong and if you have any advice for the early birds. I’m coming up on 3 months off subs.


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PostPosted: Wed Jul 09, 2014 3:54 pm 
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Don't become addicted to life. In the end, it will kill you.


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PostPosted: Wed Jul 09, 2014 3:57 pm 
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no_boop_shoo_be_doop wrote:
Don't become addicted to life. In the end, it will kill you.


"The thought of suicide is a great source of comfort; with it a calm passage is to be made across many a bad night." - Friedrich Nietzsche.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FzVxlXx6MQA


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PostPosted: Wed Jul 09, 2014 4:11 pm 
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In all seriousness, I've often wondered where Nietzsche was coming from with that. Perhaps it was a way of reminding himself that ultimately, he had control over his life, with escape hatch of suicide if all else failed. I thought of that angle when revisiting 1984.

Room 101:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pLFIxt2cK_0

Big Brother was like the Jealous God in the 10 Commandments. Rather than a mere execution, BB insisted on being the sole source of adoration in that particular dystopian tale, and went to extreme measures to make that happen to those who strayed from the flock. Inquisition anybody? Except BB replaced the Jealous God. The more things change, the more they stay the same.

Edit: A couple of missing word ("fill in the blank") typos.
Second edit: "...BB insisted on big [sic] the sole...": s/big/being


Last edited by no_boop_shoo_be_doop on Wed Jul 09, 2014 4:39 pm, edited 2 times in total.

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