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PostPosted: Tue Jan 22, 2013 8:55 pm 
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Hey Phillip thanks for checking in buddy. It was definitely s combination of personal life and overall negativity that brought me to a low I hadn't yet experienced so far.

I absolutely agree on those points. I'm doing a lot better, with some great advice from a fellow addict.

Me and the wife had a heart to heart, it made me feel a lot better. Lots of cuddling and the like. Something I've owed her for awhile. She brought me completely out of my rutt in less than an hour. My son helped also, even if he was being an evil gremlin.

Feel thousands of times better than I did with that last posting spree. I don't even remember what day I'm on now. 20? That's exciting. I've been more kind to myself in my thought process and have slowly started moving back to the positive care free WTBF that was prevalent for so many days.

No worries buddy, and thank you for checking in.

-Andrew


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PostPosted: Thu Jan 24, 2013 7:57 pm 
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Just wanted to throw in a small update.

I've started my new job. It's incredibly stressful already, but its not effected me badly. It's nice to stay occupied. I've noticed I still move my legs a lot when sitting at a desk. It's like I'm jittery. Not really a bad thing in comparison but strange. Moar clonidine? MUAHAH. Kidding.

Day 22 or something? 23?

Anxiety is all but gone. Very very small amounts at stressful times. I think that's just me though. Sleep schedule is still all over the place. I've noticed something has returned though, something I've missed dearly. Dreams. The kind when you sleep. Aha. I'm actually going to start trying to train my mind into having lucid dreams again. I think this is a great opportunity since my REM sleep is all over the place. Can't wait to fly around and shoot lasers from my eyes.

Anyhow, I'm feeling good. Not quite great, but very good. I'm being cautiously optimistic now after that recent episode of suckness. However I've been feeling very positive and happy. I also owe a friend an IM back Haha, that's next...

I'm 22 or 23 or some shit days removed from suboxone. That's exciting. I could not make my brain even fathom that on day 4. It seemed impossible. I feel like I've been able to also help people through this process. I really enjoy that feeling. I'm looking forward to the future!

Anyhow I'm obviously around I post way to much. Feel free to IM me if you ever need to talk.

Much love everyone

-WTBF


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PostPosted: Thu Jan 24, 2013 7:58 pm 
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Just wanted to stop in and say YOU ROCK! I am tapering off of subs right now after over a year and one unsucessful attempted jump from 8mg. I amdown to .5 every other day and im still acting like a huge wuss!!! Im SO NERVOUS about the step off of this!!!! Thank you sincerely for taking the time to document your progress!!!!! It really is helping me a ton to hear how you are doing and how you have come so far! Keep on keepin on from one Floridian to another :-) You're an inspiration right now and that is just what I needed! You got this thang!!!!!! :)


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PostPosted: Thu Jan 24, 2013 8:01 pm 
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Hi again Salem. I really appreciate that, I was writing that other post before I saw yours. I wrote you a long post on your thread!

Us Floridians need to stick together!

You really have been successful in that taper. You're handling it so well also!

Thank you for your support, ill keep doing my best :)


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PostPosted: Sun Jan 27, 2013 7:55 pm 
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Dreams have gotten more intense lately. I've got the strangest repeating dream where my wife is a helicopter pilot, and doesn't allow me to fly with her. So close to lucid dreams.

Simon, moar funnies please thanks ;)

Aha

Nothing real interesting to report. IBS hasn't let up yet....Baby wipes Hooooo!

-WTBF


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PostPosted: Sun Jan 27, 2013 10:42 pm 
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LMAO!!!!! The old helicopter pilot wife dream huh!? U crack me up!!!! I am glad the worst is over for you! Im gonna keep truckin :)


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PostPosted: Mon Jan 28, 2013 12:41 am 
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Have you ever seen the website People of Walmart. Google search it, then click on Photos. Read the captions.....laugh.....repeat as necessary!!

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PostPosted: Mon Jan 28, 2013 1:22 am 
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People of walmart....brilliant idea!!!!! Also....baby wipes are pretty brilliant too. Lol


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PostPosted: Tue Jan 29, 2013 2:09 pm 
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Baby Wipes indeed are genius. I've petioned to have my name changed to Baby Wipes!

(Lol)

Romeo - Ahaha absolutely perfect. I've felt the urge to walk around Walmart with my nikon and photograph some people. Unibrows galore from the people at the checkout points.

Romeo when I get home I've got a link for you with the promise of laughter to follow.

Anyhow back to work.

Keep it up Salem. You'll be a success story soon enough :)

WTBF


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PostPosted: Tue Jan 29, 2013 4:27 pm 
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Thanks WTBF!!!!!!! : :D


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PostPosted: Thu Jan 31, 2013 3:45 pm 
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Just a little life event that I wouldn't mind perspective on. My significant other has been diagnosed with post partum depression. They prescribed Zoloft.

One of the things that was bothering my wife was that her sexual urges have all but dissipated because of these depressing feelings. I'm nervous because Zoloft doesn't seem to be all that great for increasing sex drive.

I mean we do it, but nothing like pre pregnancy or shit during pregnancy. It's frustrated me a few times and I've gotten pessimistic with it more than once. Specially with getting angrier faster than while on mood destroying suboxone.

I'm frustrated. I wouldn't have prescribed fucking Zoloft. I would have prescribed Welbutrin.

Anyone have experience with Zoloft? The internetz full of negative stories about libido on it. This makes me want to blow my brains out. The least sex we've had in a long time, and my libido is through the fucking roof. Thanks suboxone.

Hum. I'm frustrated.

-WTBF


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PostPosted: Thu Jan 31, 2013 4:18 pm 
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^ I haven't had a baby yet but almost all my friends have children and they all went through imbalances after childbirth. The hormones are on a roller coaster ride. Mood swings, depression, loss of sex drive.. I think it's all relatively normal after child birth. Obviously, she knows what she needs best but it's perfectly natural to go through these ups and downs after having a baby. Look at what she went though, it only makes sense that it takes time to adjust back to "normal."


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PostPosted: Thu Jan 31, 2013 4:36 pm 
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I understand that Tiny & She's been supportive of me throughout my own experience. I would stand by her through anything.

It's the fact she's expressed her desire to go back to normal & just can't. It's frustrating to get in the mood & than let's cuddle. I'm sure its amplified to me with my emotions still on red alert, and my sex drive much higher than its been in years.

It just sucks. It really sucks. Women can view it as insensitive but when you're use to something & quite honestly its about the only "drug" you really getting and its taken away from you. Yes my daily endorphin release is quite comparable to drugs. Sexaholics?

Basically your life partner has lost interest in you. A better drug free you. Nothing you do can change it.

I love sex & she does too. It's important to our relationship & always has been ( Hello child ).

I view Zoloft as the devil right now. Bullshit that needs to be tapered to stop. Blah. The most common symptom is your ability to achieve orgasm stops. What the facuckfkdjfk.


It just doesn't make sense to me to prescribe a drug that Is known for inhibiting sexual desire when its one of your complaints.

WTBF..


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PostPosted: Thu Jan 31, 2013 4:38 pm 
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It's tough! After a baby you feel like your body is not your own anymore, at least for a while. There are so many demands on your wife right now, plus she's depressed. Please be patient with her and try to put her needs before your own for a while.

If Zoloft is what it takes for her to feel better, then just deal with the side effects for now. I do think it would be OK for you to have an honest conversation with her and her doctor about it. With the idea that maybe another drug could accomplish the same thing and not have the sexual side effects.

I don't want to be too hard on you, because I know you're frustrated. I think this is a time, though, to scratch the itch in the shower or something and be there for your wife.

Amy

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PostPosted: Thu Jan 31, 2013 4:48 pm 
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My post above was meant to say that your wife shouldn't put too much pressure on her self to be normal so quickly. It takes the body 9 months to create this child and it takes a while to go back to normal as well. I just hate to see people jump on meds for something that is possibly totally normal. That and I don't know one person who has had success with antidepressants, but that's my own biased opinion that I am trying not to factor in. I am sure plenty of people on this site can vouch for them.

I understand you have needs but dude.. come on. Are you the one putting pressure on her to get back to normal fast? In this case, you needs to put her first. Go jerk off or something. She's only going to feel worse if she's made to feel bad about not fulfilling your needs on top of the struggles of being anew mom. Give the girl a break.


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PostPosted: Thu Jan 31, 2013 5:01 pm 
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No additional pressure versus any other time in our entire relationship. It's not like I've been ravaging her about it.

It's just the overall loss. Jerking off is about as effective as being completely irrelevant on Suboxone withdrawals. I've done it, its pointless. It's the feelings, connection, intimacy I personally miss.

She's vocally stated her feelings. She got it in her head that she needed an anti depressant because I brought up the possibility of me trying them while withdrawaling.

Quite honestly its been 5 months. There has been no real attempt at life enrichment from her even though I've offered many different ideas. I love her to death but sitting home with a screaming Pissed off child & expecting to be normal and happy throughout that process is just wishful thinking. At 22 were you unable to have sex without having to really force yourself to do it? I hope not, because thats not normal.

I quite honestly don't look forward to dad time when I'm alone at home. It sucks. He's too young to interact. It's like being a slave to a little puking machine. However I do not allow myself to sit idle and get unhappy listening to him bitch at me. I go places, see people.

She doesn't.

I'm not sitting around pestering her all day. My intentions are not to come home and fall asleep at 9pm everyday. No intimacy. Get outta here, who wants to live like that?

I'm 22, she's younger. I'm patient, however I believe you can't sit around and wait for things to change. It'll never happen. It hurts.

Anyhow, my co worker is wishing to play tic tac toe, so ill be back in a few.


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PostPosted: Thu Jan 31, 2013 5:11 pm 
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Ahh.. you're 22. Ok, that explains it. I would hand my husband's ass to him on a platter if he gave me any kind of grief after having a baby. He knows better though but only after years of figuring each other out. That takes time.

If I had a baby (at 22), I probably wouldn't be as interested in sex. I'm pretty certain of it actually. It can take a while to get back to normal and even then, sex drive in relationships goes up & down. There are peaks and valleys, always. Your wife isn't even at the height of her sex drive and she's dealing with crazy hormones, a new baby, maybe weight loss too? If she needs the antidepressants for other reasons and really believes she's depressed than she should do whatever feels right but don't expect a magic pill that is going to give you a perfect wife who is ready for sex at all times. That's probably not going to happen and if it does, make sure to tell me what she's taking. :D

Sounds to me like you need to look at yourself right now as well. You're a young guy, experiencing sobriety and all the crazy emotions that come with it, learning to be dad.. having to share your wife with this screaming, puking baby.. It's all natural but all part of the game when you signed up to be a daddy. You're just going through a tough patch but this will pass. Just try to put your wife first here, in this instance she deserves it.


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PostPosted: Thu Jan 31, 2013 5:20 pm 
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Also, if your wife is younger than you.. she is just a baby! She probably doesn't even fully understand what and why she is feeling the way she does. It takes us women a while to fully process how our bodies work and the cycles they go through every month. The female body is truly an incredible thing and cruel at times.


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PostPosted: Thu Jan 31, 2013 5:24 pm 
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She's always been first Tiny.

She was my biggest motivation to quit.

Magic drug is opiates, the non suboxone kind. Sadly were both SOL There.

I don't want her to be sexually ready every 5 seconds. I want her to be sexually ready when the moment is right, which lately is never. Unfortunately that is never lately, or if we do its probably because she feels bad. I'll try if the moments right, but she won't respond. I'll stop at that point. I'll do my best to not make her feel bad. Cuddle her till she sleeps.


I never signed up, I was diagnosed as being 100% sterile. Yeah so much for that shit. ( Im a great dad, even if I don't always like being a dad. )

We've have been together years. That's the frustrating part.

Your husband will feel differently no matter how saint like he acts in the present. If you are active sexually and than just completely drop off he will eventually get frustrated. Unless he's whipped and testosterone is at 300 blood levels ( go to the doctor at this point, lol)

I don't mean that in a mean way, but talking to males all around my life share a similar opinion. Specially at our age.

I'm seeming like a womanizer and I don't mean to portray that way. But come on now.


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PostPosted: Thu Jan 31, 2013 5:26 pm 
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It's a difference of about 1 year. She's a full grown adult by all national standards.


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