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PostPosted: Fri Apr 29, 2011 1:10 am 
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HI, So im trying to see a few things, one if these side effects are common and also are they permanent. My bf and I have been dating for almost 2 years, he just started suboxone for pain pill addiction, which he heard is the most effective way to recovery without relapse. I am so proud of him for making that decision and go to rehab. BUt ever since he started suboxone he is doing alot of the same traits as when he was on the pain pills. Short temper, mood swings, extreme paranoia(he always thinks im cheating or lying) and memory loss. Im wondering if this is common and also if its going to last as long as the recovery process. Do u taper off suboxone? will the symptoms lessen. WHen he started it he even said the first day he felt "high" and when we had a fight an hour later bc he thought i was seeing someone else, he said it might be the med. WHen he got off the pain pills and before suboxone, 5 days, everything felt great, he was honest and was actually alive, now its feeling like im going in circles. One day he loves me and misses me and one day, he has to let me go, because he refuses to be with a girl who had been with many men!!! i dont know how long to hold one to what might be, any insight to this would really help....do i wait it out..... or get out while i still have pride and self confidence.....
sincerly,
How long for love and sobriety.


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PostPosted: Fri Apr 29, 2011 6:46 am 
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Hi onhisside and welcome. I think it's great that you're so supportive of your partner and reaching out to educate yourself about his treatment.

Based on what you've described, I wouldn't call what he's experiencing common side effects of suboxone. In fact I've never heard of those symptoms being related to suboxone at all. The thing that came to mind while I was reading your post is that perhaps he has an underlying mental health condition. Often such a thing is what leads people to self-medicate with drugs in the first place. Obviously I could be way off base here, but it's just something that occurred to me and I thought I would mention.

Also, when we were using the opiates numbed our feelings and now without them all those feelings come rushing back and we don't know how to deal with them. I wonder if that could be a factor with him as well.

I'm sorry I can't give you better answers. I'm sure others will come along with some thoughts of their own. Good luck and again, welcome to the forum.

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PostPosted: Fri Apr 29, 2011 8:55 am 
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Hi,

I do think he needs some time to stabilize on Sub to see if he gets to a baseline emotionally....but I also wonder if he has any other mental health diagnosis? Has he ever been assessed for depression, bipolar disorder or other issues? His paranoia and "Jealousy" could just be him...It's hard to tell without more info.

I'd give him some time on the Sub....let him stabilize a couple of months. Hopefully he is taking his dose as prescribed, not trying to use on top of it...or drink or use any other mood altering substances unless prescribed by his dr.

Recovery takes a long time. Stopping drugs, getting stabilized, allowing the brain to heal...those first 3-4 months are just the beginning. Depending on his history and how long he used he will need to change how he thinks...his behaviors...and find new tools to learn to deal with life. He'll have to learn how to feel his feelings rather than medicate them and it takes time to do all of that. If you can take care of yourself while he is doing this work....go to Alanon (which is for family members of people who are addicted) or counseling yourself...that would help you. You can't give up you while he recovers...so keep working out, eating well, setting good boundaries. You cannot fix him as you probably know. And the fact that you are looking at how long should you stay if he continues this behavior shows that you probably do have good boundaries...good for you for understanding that. When living with an addict who is using we can end up sometimes as sick emotionally....

Only you know what you can handle...and if you can trust that he is doing what he needs for his recovery. Many of us use as a way to treat underlying disorders like depression....many use because we just can't feel those feelings of sadness, ,or anger, loneliness etc...hopefully his Sub dr has done a good mental health assessment on him to rule out any other problems and/or to treat any other issues that arise. If not, I'd suggest that he get a good mental health assessment during this time. Not all Sub doctors understand mental health and not all Sub dr do these much needed assessments.

Remember, nothing you do will change him. He has to do this work. And nothing you do will make him stay clean or use. We change when we are ready...as I'm sure you know. The best thing you can do is take care of you and if that means leaving for a while or for good then that is what you should do. You'll know.

Take care.


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PostPosted: Fri Apr 29, 2011 12:01 pm 
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I had all those symptoms except parnoria... I didn't have that one. But the mood swings and memory loss was a big one. I did also loose any ability for sex. I also had bowel problems and sleep problems if taken too soon to bedtime. When still I would fall asleep so really couldn't watch a long movie or read a book either. We are all different and what works for one doesn't work for another. It may be that he will get use to the sub and "stabilize" also... time will tell.


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PostPosted: Fri Apr 29, 2011 12:53 pm 
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Onhisside,

I am sorry that you're having issues with your boyfriend; it sounds like a really tough situation. I'd like to reiterate what hat and a couple others have said - that your boyfriend could be suffering from a mental illness (for example, bipolar disorder), which might have been masked to some degree during active addiction, only to emerge more noticeably once he became stable on suboxone and lost the ability to self-medicate with his drug(s) of choice.

Depending on how long it's been since he started treatment, it's also possible that your boyfriend is suffering from the type of mild withdrawal that sub induction sometimes leads to in people who have tolerance higher than the level of opioid relief the sub provides; if this is true, irritability and a high energy state, somewhat similar to mania, are certainly possible. In this case, these problems should gradually get better over a couple of weeks as his tolerance returns to a level at which the sub provides complete relief.

I hate to be the one to raise this next possibility, and I saw nothing in your post to suggest that it is likely, but I am an opiate addict and know how treatment-resistant and tough to beat the disease of addiction can be. With that said - is there a possibility that your boyfriend is still using at all? That he might take the sub some days, and go back to his drug of choice on others? Is he being drug tested regularly and randomly? If not, this pattern of behavior would explain some of his symptoms. As I said above, I have NO reason to think that this is true; in all likelihood, your boyfriend is embracing recovery fully and simply suffering from some other issue. However, I thought it important to at least mention the fact that a sub prescription does not guarantee complete abstinence from other substances for some people.

Again, I truly hope that things with you boyfriend get better! It's great that he has someone as concerned and proactive as you in his corner.


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 Post subject: I am so sorry"Onhisside"
PostPosted: Thu May 05, 2011 3:50 pm 
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[font=Century Gothic]Hello *Onhisside* and welcome to this group, everyone here has given such great advice they really took the words right out of my mouth as usual *Hatmaker* and *China* but I do think that they hit the nail on the head, I think that your boyfriend does indeed have an underlying mental health condition and from what you have described one disease that comes to mind that seems to be self medicated quite often is "Bi-Polar Disorder", that would explain allot of his actions, the mood swings the paranoia the jealousy the mania aka highs and lows, and as everyone has said he has probably been dealing with this for so long by self medicating that now that he has no "barrier or protection" from it his symptoms may feel ten times worse to him now. Is there anyway that you might be able to approach the subject with him? Im not necessarily saying ask him if he thinks theres a chance he may have a mental disease i just mean talk to him about his feelings, his moods his emotions? Is there anyway that you could go to his Subox doctor appointment with him and voice your concerns with the doctor either in front of your boyfriend or take the doctor to the side and talk to him privately about your boyfriends symptoms? I just feel like you are a very caring girlfriend who is trying her damnedest to fight for her relationship with an addict which is hard enough alone, but to add a mental illness into the mix, and even if he kicks his DOC, if he is truly dealing with bi-polar disorder or depression, it may plague him, your relationship and his RECOVERY will always be in jeopardy if the underlying problem is not dealt with. I hope this helped and i truly hope he begins to feel better and your relationship gets better. God bless you darlin you are a strong woman, being with an addict is not easy and it is clearly evident how much you truly love him. Good Luck and keep us posted! [/font]

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PostPosted: Fri May 06, 2011 11:51 am 
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My dear you said he just started correct??? Give it time. Im sure he felt a little "high" off of it. I did as well. Really what the high was was a little drowsiness. I've switched to the films and I don't get that anymore. Give him the benefit of the doubt. He may still have underlying issues before you started dating. Was he on pills when you started or did he start afterwards??? We're all different. I would give him some time. Be there for him and talk to him. My wife is my best friend. I can talk to her about anything. She stood by me through thick and thin.

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You armed me with strength for battle, you made my adversaries bow at my feet. Psalm 18:39


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