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 Post subject: All Good Things...
PostPosted: Fri Apr 26, 2013 9:11 am 
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I am sure there may be a thread out there already on this topic, but I figured I would start a new on anyway! One my way home from taking my kids to scchool today, I could not help but be amazed at the drastic (positive) changes I have encountered since stopping opoids and starting Suboxone. Here is just a glimse as I am sure there is infinitely more :D

* I have gotten up and out of bed everyday at around 6:30am. This is new because for so long I would lay in bed dreading having to get up.

* I wake up in a normal mood. I am not going to say I am jolly when I hop out of bed, but I am not in a foul mood, cursing under my breath about how my kids drive me nutty.

* I stay awake all day. I used take a "nap". Usually bc I was either out of pills and therefore kicking the covers, or bc I had to wait until the afternoon to score.

* I have energy to do normal hosuehold chores without taking pills and withour feeling like I am taking on the weight of the world to do so. This is so amazing to me bc with such a large family I used to feel so overwhelmed sometimes that I just would say "screw it" and not even do regular household chores for a day or two. Laundry for a family of 8 piles up quick, I tell ya!

* I have LOTS more patients. I find myself NOT getting easily annoyed by small things.

* I complain less, and talk calmly more. I know the kids can tell the difference (even though they don't know anything about my problem or that I have sought treatment). They all seem so much happier when I am happier.

* I can stick to a commitment. My family and I had been wanting to go back to church for moths now, but come Sunday morning, I always just let everyone sleep in. No more. We have been to church the last three Sundays and we all enjoy it so much!

* I can tackle tasks I have put off and put off bc I figured they would go away. Three words: Student Loan Consolidation. No more default letters coming daily in the mail and not giving a crap.

* I feel so much more socialable. I reply to friends' texts and phone calls. I go out to breakfast/lunch with my girlfriends. Its like I had hid myself away for so long, not wanting to go out because I really didnt even wanna talk to people.

* I am making lists again. I used to make lists DAILY for the things I had to get done for the day, and I used to get them done. Not the last few years though. But hey...I'm baaaaaaaaack!

I am sure there are so many more, but that is all I have time for right now.

PLEASE feel free to add to this list!!!!!! I love love love reading about all the positive ways life changes once we get our addictions under control.

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PostPosted: Fri Apr 26, 2013 10:57 am 
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I can really relate to the part where you talked about doing things again like going to lunch with your girlfriends. My family and friends would always want to make plans with me to hang out or go to lunch or whatever. I realized after making plans over and over and not being able to keep them because I was sick from withdrawal and couldn't go out or I was waiting on pills to be brought to me that I just shouldn't make plans anymore. So for a long time people would call and invite me to do things and I would always make up some stupid excuse for why I couldn't go. I'm so glad I can tell my family now yeah I'll go to lunch with you on Tuesday because I no longer have to fear the unknown of how I will feel that day. Will I be out of pills and sick? Will have taken too many pills and be nodding out? I can't go to lunch with my dad in the middle of withdrawals and I certainly can go to lunch and be nodding off.

I have so much more free time now to spend with my loved ones without the daily grind of find money for pills, find pills, get high, have no more pills and get sick.

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PostPosted: Fri Apr 26, 2013 11:32 pm 
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In addition to the great things y'all mentioned, I'm also pretty stoked about the fact that I don't hate myself anymore. During my active addiction, I pretty much came to loathe myself because I couldn't clean up. I wanted so bad to stop abusing drugs, but couldn't.

Suboxone enabled me to take that massive step into getting a handle on my addiction and that helped in allowing me to forgive myself for all the stupid shit I had done, which let me not hate myself anymore.....WOO-HOO!!!! :D

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PostPosted: Sun Apr 28, 2013 2:51 pm 
wow you guys seem exited about how your feeling. It would be a shame if that feeling went away wouldnt it? It would realy realy suck if a few years from now suboxone quit doing it for you wouldnt it? Mayby you should consider discontinuing the drug now wile things are going well because in a few years the steady 24/7 high that suboxone provides for a few years turns into a steady 24/7 low. I understand that your not high like you would be on a full agonist but the way that your feeling right now is drug inuced state by an opiat and it does not lat forever. People that stop using suboxone during this honeymoon phase can get off the drug pretty easily but people who wait untill the honeymoon is over will have a much much bigger problem than they did before they got on subs. Please consider the fact that this is a chemicaly produced FEELING of well being and that IT DOES NOT LAST it becomes very very ugly after the years start to pass if you dont stop during this honeymoon phase.


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 Post subject: Leave us alone
PostPosted: Sun Apr 28, 2013 3:19 pm 
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Why do some people feel the need to rain on everybody's parade?

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun Apr 28, 2013 3:32 pm 
Im not tying to rain on anybodys parade, i used suboxone for the better part of a decade and i used to feel exactly the same way the o.p. feels i couldnt believe how much my problems SEEMED to be solved for a few years, but after a few more years the drug turns on you. If somebody had told me how suboxone treatment would go back when i thought it was gods gift to me than i would be so much better off today. Its not raining on their parade giving them some direction. If you feel good on suboxone and just take this casual attude of oh ill stop when the time is right than your headed for some serious serious trouble....worse than before suboxone......


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PostPosted: Sun Apr 28, 2013 8:03 pm 
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mrbiznaz is a perpetual troll of this site. He's gone by many different screen names and as the mods can, they ban his latest accounts.

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PostPosted: Sun Apr 28, 2013 8:49 pm 
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Suboxone won't fix anything.

If you work at recovery and try to change your personality, ideas, and attitudes.... It won't seem like you have things under control.

You know you do.

Well. Somewhat lol


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 Post subject: BEFORE
PostPosted: Sun Apr 28, 2013 9:19 pm 
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Just as a small side note - all the things I listed as being "good" are all ways I USED to feel BEFORE I got in the stupid cycle of taking pills. I had always been a pretty happy, outgoing, lively, determined, fun-loving, and excited-about-life type of person. Lots of those traits were dampened by my abuse of opiates. I know that Suboxone is not a magic medication, so if it seemed like I was saying my world is now beautiful where it had previously been colorless, that is not what I was trying to say. I was trying to say there are so many things that I do feel "normal" about again. I am not under same false impression that Suboxone is going to fix my every problem and I know I still have work to do. But I am an optimist - always have been, always will be. 8) Part of my addiction was that a few years prior to me getting addicted I had gone thru some major life changes and during that time I had lost and/or given up most the things that made me feel ALIVE. I have been working (even before I got clean) on getting those things back, so that I do not feel a void - especially not a void that I fill with pills.

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PostPosted: Mon Apr 29, 2013 1:37 am 
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Amy,

I'm sorry this guy has stained your beautiful thread. Don't even think you need to defend yourself or explain anything. He is just a troll and loves to rile up any good feeling thread.


I for one enjoy the small things in life. 1) Like a hot shower and the feeling of being nice and clean. 2) Buying a new wallet. Not much money but I love the smell of leather. 3) Being able to sleep in an extra hour. 4) Reading a thread like yours that make me smile at how misery turned into happiness.


Things like that make me very grateful.

R62

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PostPosted: Mon Apr 29, 2013 1:54 am 
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Sleeping next to an open window and feeling the nice cool breeze on your skin. One of my favorite things ever!
Waking up really early while everyone else is asleep and just enjoying the peace and quiet.
Driving in my car with the music turned up singing as loud as I can.

Brown paper packages tied up with string these are a few of my favorite things!

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Apr 29, 2013 1:37 pm 
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rule62 wrote:
but I love the smell of leather.



It's so funny you say that.. me too. I can smell leather with my eyes closed and tell you what kind of skin it is and how it's been treated, for reals. It's kind of my "thing." LOL


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Apr 29, 2013 3:44 pm 
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Hahahaha.

The smell of leather reminds me of my dad and my grandpa.

It's that smell of their coats from when I was little.

Agreed. The best.

There are so many good things in life once you can take the time to look at them.

Think about how lucky you are! Lucky to be alive, be drug free, have some money, have a house, have a car, have anything good. Some have none of these. Nothing.

Feeling blessed.


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PostPosted: Mon May 06, 2013 10:05 pm 
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Romeo wrote:
I'm also pretty stoked about the fact that I don't hate myself anymore. During my active addiction, I pretty much came to loathe myself because I couldn't clean up. I wanted so bad to stop abusing drugs, but couldn't.




this is exactly how I was, the last two years of using,,, I think after I had my son, it kinda "hit me" that I needed to quit,,, but no matter what I tried, what I did,,, I just couldn't.... and every time I tried,, It just sorta got WORSE....

it was like well, if I'm gonna be a junkie, might as well be a GOOD ONE.......
funny,,, but not really....

AND,,,
the second most important thing,,,,,
everyone close to me
always had this look of PURE disgust, on their face... I don't know if it was disgust, disappointment, what exactly.
but they always looked mad, and NEVER smiled.....

now as I pull in the driveway, my grandma is smiling ear to ear, coming out to greet me. She wouldn't even move from her seat, back in the "day"
same goes for my husband,,, he always looked mad, no matter what... and Now of course I don't blame them,,, but then,
I just didn't "get it"


Amy, that was an AWESOME thread starter.... Gold stars for you

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 Post subject: Money!!
PostPosted: Mon May 20, 2013 11:45 am 
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This weekend I went shopping with my youngest daughter. We went out and bought some summer clothes and flip flops and things. It was so awesome to be able to SHOP! Just a few months back I would have gotten paid and went directly to buy whatever pills I had lined up for that Friday, and probably had to stop by some where to drop off $$ I had borrowed against my paycheck too. Within two hrs of getting paid, I used to be broke. I now actually have money to carry around in my purse!!! Lol. I had honestly forgotten the joy I feel when browsing for and actually being able to PURCHASE things for my kids or the family! Now dont get me wrong, I am not rich by any means (6 kids, plus my bf and I)- my man has a good paying union job (concrete finisher), but I only work part time and am mostly a stay-at-home-mom. But when I figure the hundreds and hundreds of $ I used to scrape up for pills - it is just so rewarding to see that money spent on things I can see and touch a week later......
Did any of you notice such a change in your financial circumstances when getting clean? (And yes, I consider those of us just on Sub clean). I know I'm not the only one! :) :) :)

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