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PostPosted: Wed Jan 19, 2011 8:09 pm 
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Hi all. I will try to make this quick and would love some thoughts! This is my first day on this site and finally speaking out about the addiction that took over my life. My boyfriend and I started doing oxys recreationally about 2 years ago. During the past 10 months it progressed into an every day thing. I depleted my bank account and spend all of my money on them. Our relationship was/is rocky strictly because of them (fights mainly about how we would get them, money, etc.. you know the deal). I will usually do anywhere between 60-200mg/day (closer to 200mg on payday). I FINALLY decided to get help after months of really wanting to stop. I never thought of myself as the kind of person that would need to get help for a drug addiction. No one else besides my boyfriend knows about my problem and I have kept it from even my closest friends. I also dont see my friends much anymore because of my problem. For months i would justify my reasons for going to get more pills. I just couldnt stop and since my relationship was going downhill because of it, it would make both of us want to do it even more. My boyfriend went to detox last week and relapsed. We are both a bad influence on each other. He will be (hopefully) starting on the subs soon.

Today I started suboxone. I called on Monday and was able to start the films a few hours ago. My doc started me on 12mg/d. I feel pretty good and i have a lot of hope for the future. i was smoking the oxys which i think (besides the fact that it makes me feel wonderful) is one of the reasons why i love to do them. i loved the whole process. Either way, today is my first day off oxys and not trying to figure out how i will get them. i pray i will never go back to them. I havent even been 24 hours sober yet :( but some advice would be great or even motivation from anyone taking the subs successfully! Thanks everyone!


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PostPosted: Wed Jan 19, 2011 9:01 pm 
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Hi Ab and welcome to the forum. Congrats on making the decision to start Sub. I switched to Subs about 2 months ago after being on a methadone maintenance program for 2.5 years after an intense vicodin addiction. I had 5 years clean and sober prior to my last relapse...that relapse lasted about 2 years then I started on methadone maintenance...there are many reasons I switched to Sub, one of the reasons being that while on methadone I just had no affect, no sex drive, felt angry all the time and gained a shit load of weight! So vanity would be my first reason to switch....LOL...actually I am very happy to be on Sub. It has changed my life and my outlook on life. I feel more myself, happier overall, and have the ability to make better decisions, think clearly.

I also attend 12 step meetings...I did this during my first five years sober when there wasn't an option for Sub (had never considered methadone at that time). The meetings helped me change my thinking and my behaviors...and helped me address the reasons why I used in the first place. I beleive there are many ways to recover and this combination is what helps me maintain a more positive and healthy attitude. Just me...it's not for everyone and that's ok.

That said, I wonder if you have a counselor or someone else you can talk to along with being on Sub? Maybe a group for Sub users in your area? Or SMART recovery? 12 step meetings....Again, I am not saying anything but that it helped me and being new on Sub and in recovery is very challenging. The forum will offer a lot of support as well and I am grateful to have found this site. It really helped me during my induction especially.

I hope you have a positive experience and many others here will most likely offer advice and support.

Again, welcome and keep asking questions....

Chinagirl


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PostPosted: Wed Jan 19, 2011 9:28 pm 
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Hey AB,

A really big welcome from another pain pill addict! You made the right choice so far, just stay with the program and try not to think too much and you'll be okay.

The main thing is to adjust to the daily use of Sub and break the bad habit of smoking the Oxy's. Whatever ritual we have to get high becomes less and less on the mind as time goes by. In the beginning it will still dominate your thinking, but the Sub takes away the craving so it makes it that much easier.

Now you have to figure out how to handle the b/f. He needs to be in recovery too or you'll both relapse. You do what's best for YOU!

Keep coming here to stay motivated and maybe even try to find some other support avenues to help you.

You'll make it,

Tom


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PostPosted: Wed Jan 19, 2011 11:55 pm 
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Welcome to the forum AB! Congrats on your decision to get through this nasty addiction and move on with your life. Today is the first day you are getting your life back which is pretty exciting.

I have been on suboxone for over 3 years with a short 3 month stint off of them last year. I too had a short two year addiction to oxycontin (chewing it). No one knew except my sister and a couple close friends. My husband didn't even know.

I agree that at first, it is very strange because you have gone from this obsessive process that consumes you to feeling normal for the most part. Is it too good to be true? What do you do with yourself then? What do you do with those emotions that creep up on you?

Most people who get on sub find it very tempting to take MORE at one point or another. They feel it isn't working as well one day or fear withdrawal and take a little extra. Most of us then realize very quickly that MORE does nothing MORE at all and it was a waste. Don't bother taking more.

It will only lead you to run out early at which point you will realize you are in fact dependent on suboxone too and if you don't take it...you get sick. This is when you take oxycontin again and risk getting booted from your suboxone program. Again....don't bother taking MORE.

When you take oxycontin again (if you go the route most addicts do) you will also quickly realize that it doesn't get you high anymore either and was a total waste. Don't bother taking opiates while on suboxone.

The fear of withdrawal is hard to get through because most people have been through it so many times. Suboxone has a very long half life. If you take your suboxone and in 12 hours feel less than perky or fear your nose is running or think that sneeze you just had is the beginning of withdrawal.....you probably should take a benadryl because you have allergies. One you stabilize on suboxone (couple weeks) you can go at least 24 hours to 48 hours without suboxone and not experience any type of withdrawal at all. Withdrawal doesn't generally begin for about 2-3 days. So don't be obsessive about not getting your dose on time or whatever.

Try taking your suboxone all at once, one time per day. Taking it multiple times per day gets people in the habit of relying on suboxone to help manage their emotions and life in general. You have to get through those without a placebo or anything else so your brain learns it CAN.

Find a good therapist and work on those things about yourself that caused you to enjoy getting high to begin with. Suboxone in and of itself won't cure you. Therapy helps tremendously. There will be a point in time where you consider getting off suboxone or want to be off of it. The sooner you prepare yourself for that the better.

That's all I got. Again, congrats! and Welcome!

Cherie

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PostPosted: Thu Jan 20, 2011 10:16 am 
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When it comes to motivation, I can tell you that I've been on sub just over two years and it has helped me to completely change my life. I've been in addiction remission since then with no relapses and still getting better all the time. You've just started your journey and have so much in the way of positive changes ahead of you. Personally, I also go to therapy (I was going even before I started sub) and it helps me tremendously. Good luck and keep up the good work.

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PostPosted: Thu Jan 27, 2011 3:05 pm 
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Wellcome to this site. I'm new here as well but have been on Suboxone for over 2 years now. They have saved my life. Yo will find alot of support here. just know that you are not alone. We are all here for each other.


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PostPosted: Sat Mar 12, 2011 12:36 pm 
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Good for you, thats really awesome that you decided to get some help, i cant speak like a pro on the subject but i am on day 4 of Suboxen and can say that everyday on them feels better and better, everyday you wake up and feel more hopeful, less depressed. You start remembering dreams you once had, you will be getting along with your boyfriend better than ever before because this wonderfully clear mind and energy to spare just keeps getting better. Everyday you wake up you feel stronger and stronger. So congratulations, my advice is to gt ur boyfriend on Suboxen as soon as humanly possible and u guys can go through it together. Just dont give up, find a care coach or a councelor to talk to and just let the Suboxen help you clear the cobwebs away and help you get your life back!


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PostPosted: Tue Apr 12, 2011 7:43 pm 
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You made the right choice!!!

I remember what i felt the first day on suboxone. I told everyone i felt like i was back from the dead....that i went to hell and now i'm free!! I have been on suboxone for three years from heroin and pain killer addiction. I gotta say it saved my life...that and Jesus. I got a great job, i'm the best tech at my company and i married a beautiful woman (who i met at a church group). I thank Jesus for her and for the life He has given me. I have no intentions of getting off now, but each person is different.

The best rules i heard is Take it slow at your own pace. Don't let no doctor tell you when to lower your dose. And above all else GET AWAY FROM ALL BAD INFLUENCES!!! I don't know your exact situation but "friends" you had related to drugs...they gotta go. Get away from where you used to hang out. Go to church or meetings. And take care of yourself... that is most important. I pray for your success. God Bless!!

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